Close Encounters of the Turd Kind


Chris Jensen’s Christmas “Negativity Scene” adds an extraterrestrial to The Greatest Story Ever Told.

We love award-winning plumber (City Paper’s “Best Plumber” 2004, 2005 and 2010)   Chris Jensen for many reasons (including such memorable Jensen Plumbing Service slogans as “#1 in the #2 Business” and “Your Poop is My Bread and Butter”), but none more strongly than his “Negativity Scene” – a Christmas nativity scene that adds a space alien paying props to the baby Jesus – that sits atop his Charles Village abode at the corner of Howard and 28th Street.


It’s one of our favorite local Roadside Attractions, but not everyone is a fan of the former Atomic TV cameraman and self-proclaimed Turd Tsar of Baltimore (not to mention amateur go-go dancer) adding a green glow-in-the-dark E.T. to the traditional nativity story. Suzanne Muldowney (aka “Underdog Lady”), best known for her portrayal of ’60s canine cartoon superhero Underdog in the Mayor’s Annual Christmas Parade in Hampden, once described Jensen’s holiday display as “disgusting.” Fortunately, Atomic TV was there to record her reaction to Jensen’s space age away-in-a-manger scene following one of her Christmas Parade visits.

Ms. Muldowney was not alone in abhoring the nativity scene, as this letter from a neighbor to Jensen attests:


Anonymous Neighbor: “The ALEIN [sic] is anti Jesus. I’ll be prayer [sic] for you because you are the anti Christ. And the Leg Lady Lamp is sinful.”

As the above letter illustrates, Jensen stirs controversy even even he turns from the sacred to the secular. You see, Jensen also adorns his townhouse with a nod to everyone’s favorite holiday movie, A Christmas Story, mounting a gigantic, 20-foot long illuminated tribute to the Leg Lamp from that film classic. Though it elicits chuckles from most passersby, an anonymous neighbor deemed the electric fishnet-covered leg downright “sinful.”


Chris Jensen always gets a leg up on the holiday display competition in Charles Village.

Though his Christmas spirit may not be shared by everyone, Jensen clearly just wants to spread cheer at the  end of year.


Chris Jensen won’t shit bricks if you don’t like his holiday displays.

So lighten up, Baltimore, and flush away your cares!


Can’t we all just get along? Custom-made holiday card for Jensen Plumbing by Tom Chalkley.

This entry was posted in Atomic TV, Baltimore Babylon, Baltimorons, Charles Village, Chris Jensen, Christmas, Holidays, Neighborhoods, Pranks, Roadside Attractions, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Close Encounters of the Turd Kind

  1. Lisa Simeone says:

    Chris is the best! We’re honored to have him in Charles Village (well, kind of on the cusp of Remington he is), and I’m proud to call him both plumber and friend. Where else can you get a comedy routine along with fixed pipes?

  2. The Anti-Christ says:

    What’s Jensen doing with my leg lamp!?

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