The Year Without a Mayor’s Christmas Parade…

…and The Ghosts of Mayor’s Christmas Parades Past

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By Tom Warner (Baltimore Or Less)

No, that’s not the title of  an old Rankin/Bass holiday TV special, but a lament for the 2013 Mayor’s Christmas Parade in Hampden, which was cancelled by the event organizers on December 8th due to a snow storm. It was the first-ever cancellation since the parade started in 1972.

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Suzanne Muldowney wants to know: “Where is everyone?!?”

2013 was also The Year Without an Underdog, as the cancelled 41st annual Christmas Parade meant that Suzanne Muldowney could not continue her streak of appearing in the parade every year (and 24 consecutive times) since 1988 – almost always as 1960s canine cartoon superhero Underdog. (Suzanne’s only non-Underdog appearances here were her 2003 turn as The Ghost of Christmas Past and her 2006 and 2012 portrayal as The Fairy of the Golden Snow.) The canning of this year’s parade also meant audiences were deprived of seeing Suzanne celebrate the 170th anniversary of the publication of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol (Chapman & Hall, 1843) by appearing once again as “The Ghost of Christmas Past.” But have no fear, Underdog fans! Suzanne will be sure to be back in character for the 42nd annual Mayor’s Christmas Parade in 2014, as it will mark the 50th anniversary of the debut of the Underdog TV cartoon show.

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This year the crippled children walked alone.

And have no fear, holiday parade fans: Baltimore Or Less is here to help recall “The Ghosts of Mayor’s Parades” past, starting with coverage of last year’s 2012 Mayor’s Christmas Parade in Hampden.

Continue reading The Ghosts of Mayor’s Christmas Parades Past:

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2012 Mayor’s Christmas Parade in Hampden (Accelerated Decrepitude)

Animals on Parade @ 2010 Mayor’s Christmas Parade (YouTube)

Hampden Christmas Parade 2006 (Accelerated Decrepitude)

Suzanne Muldowney Overcomes Illness to March on Underdog’s 45th Anniversary (YouTube)

Bizarre Parade Floats Abound at Mayor’s Christmas Parade (BoL)

Underdog in 1998 Hampden Xmas Parade (YouTube)

1997 Mayor’s Christmas Parade in in Hampden (BoL)

Posted in Christmas, Festivals, Hampden, Holidays, Neighborhoods, Roadside Attractions | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Spelling-Challenged Confederate Group to meet in Maryland

“Declaration of Independance… Join us for a peacful meeting and discusion on what we can all do to better our country… PLEASE BARE WITH US. WEBSITE IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION!!!” — Confederate White Knights web site

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CWK rules include acting in full “klanishness,” no intimate relations outside of your race and no drinking and smoking while in costume. http://confederatewhiteknights.com

KKK group to hold meeting in county building Friday

By Jane Bellmyer (Cecil Daily News, 12/20/2013)

ELKTON — A group with ties to to Ku Klux Klan will hold a public meeting Friday night in the Cecil County Administration building.

The Confederate White Knights have reserved the Elk Room for the 7 p.m. meeting, according to the group’s website.
Richard Preston, imperial wizard of the 2-year-old group, said the meeting will focus on illegal immigration and President Barack Obama.

“Barack Hussein Obama is an illegal president,” Preston said. “He needs to be removed from office. We also want ‘Obamacare’ shut down. It’s against citizen’s rights.”

“On top of that, we want the laws toughened on immigration,” he added. “We’re flooded with illegal immigrants and our people can’t find jobs.”

Preston insists CWK is not about skin color.

“It’s not about race. It’s about America,” he said. “It’s time for the American people to stand up.”

Continue reading at Cecil Daily.

Related:

  • Confederate White Knights will host first public meeting in Elkton — Baltimore Sun

Posted in 2010s, Baltimorons | Leave a comment

“Walking in an Essex Wonderland”

An oldie but goodie from the Baltimore Or Less Christmas archives. Happy Holidays!

Merry Christmas from Balmer Hon! Brett Harlow won $500 from a 98 Rock contest when he submitted his song “Walking in an Essex Wonderland.”

Essex Wonderland from Bianca Dunk on Myspace.

Posted in Christmas, Essex / Middle River, Holidays, Music, Radio | Tagged | 1 Comment

Close Encounters of the Turd Kind

Negativity-Scene

Chris Jensen’s Christmas “Negativity Scene” adds an extraterrestrial to The Greatest Story Ever Told.

We love award-winning plumber (City Paper’s “Best Plumber” 2004, 2005 and 2010)   Chris Jensen for many reasons (including such memorable Jensen Plumbing Service slogans as “#1 in the #2 Business” and “Your Poop is My Bread and Butter”), but none more strongly than his “Negativity Scene” – a Christmas nativity scene that adds a space alien paying props to the baby Jesus – that sits atop his Charles Village abode at the corner of Howard and 28th Street.

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It’s one of our favorite local Roadside Attractions, but not everyone is a fan of the former Atomic TV cameraman and self-proclaimed Turd Tsar of Baltimore (not to mention amateur go-go dancer) adding a green glow-in-the-dark E.T. to the traditional nativity story. Suzanne Muldowney (aka “Underdog Lady”), best known for her portrayal of ’60s canine cartoon superhero Underdog in the Mayor’s Annual Christmas Parade in Hampden, once described Jensen’s holiday display as “disgusting.” Fortunately, Atomic TV was there to record her reaction to Jensen’s space age away-in-a-manger scene following one of her Christmas Parade visits.

Ms. Muldowney was not alone in abhoring the nativity scene, as this letter from a neighbor to Jensen attests:

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Anonymous Neighbor: “The ALEIN [sic] is anti Jesus. I’ll be prayer [sic] for you because you are the anti Christ. And the Leg Lady Lamp is sinful.”

As the above letter illustrates, Jensen stirs controversy even even he turns from the sacred to the secular. You see, Jensen also adorns his townhouse with a nod to everyone’s favorite holiday movie, A Christmas Story, mounting a gigantic, 20-foot long illuminated tribute to the Leg Lamp from that film classic. Though it elicits chuckles from most passersby, an anonymous neighbor deemed the electric fishnet-covered leg downright “sinful.”

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Chris Jensen always gets a leg up on the holiday display competition in Charles Village.

Though his Christmas spirit may not be shared by everyone, Jensen clearly just wants to spread cheer at the  end of year.

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Chris Jensen won’t shit bricks if you don’t like his holiday displays.

So lighten up, Baltimore, and flush away your cares!

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Can’t we all just get along? Custom-made holiday card for Jensen Plumbing by Tom Chalkley.

Posted in Atomic TV, Baltimore Babylon, Baltimorons, Charles Village, Chris Jensen, Christmas, Holidays, Neighborhoods, Pranks, Roadside Attractions, Uncategorized | 2 Comments